Moving into the 2nd month of the project. Yesterday – one of my ex-colleague mentioned that he did noticed some physical difference. And I said – yes there is because I am currently pursuing the effort to change my physical appearance. Where I am now is not healthy and I would probably would die at some point of time. In fact – my other ex-colleague already lost 20kg and most of it is due to food, and some parts is due to the workout. I think I am on the right track, but of course need to continue to work hard.
I am not even shy from saying that I am in this journey because part of the principle of going thru this project is to be open with regards to what I am doing. There is no point of being shy because the physical appearance already enough to show that I am in need of such project or journey. In fact where I was two months ago is just way too crazy. I was so big, blowing out of proportion. Way bigger than I originally was. All the calorie intake is just crazy.
As I mentioned before in my previous posts, during this journey when I am extremely aware of the food that I take, I do realise about how much of food that I ate then. Without proper control of the food, I am going to kill myself eventually. Now what I wish is that there are no growth that is in my body as a result of my constant abuse. Slowly but surely I will be back to normal. 10 months to be exact.
This is a journey of transformation. Anything that goes fast not going to go anywhere. I do hope that I will be OK at some point. It is definitely extremely difficult to be able to handle the shit that I am handling now. But I guess transformation must start with putting a wall in my head that I can do this. Once the wall is there, I would be able to focus on pushing myself hard.
Yesterday – food was good. For breakfast I technically had vegetables and eggs. The assam fish died!
For lunch – I had my left over chicken in soy sauce. Because I was still hungry, I had one more piece of fried chicken. I seriously need to skip all these fried stuffs because I may be losing weight, but I do not want to have clogged artery. Seriously – need to stay alive!
For dinner – went to Pavillion for an expensive meal – Korean BBQ. Had mostly vegetables and some meat. Was doing really well to be honest.
I need to continue this. Must be focused for this week. This week is where I need the most. Focus focus focus and I will be OK 🙂