I mentioned about last week being an extremely challenging week. I have imagined what I want to do within the week because I know it was going to be challenging. But the result was pure disaster. Here goes the list of disaster that happened, if I remember correctly:
- Day 63 of 364 – Had Mcd fried chicken for lunch!
- Day 64 of 364 – Had various snacks during workshop and ended the day with a Popeye fried chicken at night because I was hungry
- Day 65 of 364 – Had onion dosa and Mcdonalds burger
- Day 66 of 364 – Had two wraps for lunch. One of the war was Nasi Lemak. No gym in the morning.
- Day 67 of 364 – Had Ramly burger for lunch, followed by hot dog. No gym in the morning.
- Day 68 of 364 – Had KFC for lunch and durian for breakfast. No gym in the morning. Also had a popping cake from Starbucks.
From the list above – I can tell that the last 6 days have been extremely crazy. I consumed way too much processed food, did not workout for most of the days. It is just crazy. I have not idea what was going into my mind. I wish I was a bit more sane. But I guess the week is over and now it is time to move on and go back on track. What’s worst is that I sprained my ankle while walking on Day 66. Thank god that there weren’t any fracture. So I am all good. But I would need to rest for at least 2 weeks. I can either swim or row for cardio. For weights, it will need to be non-weight bearing exercises.
The disastrous week going to throw me off course, but this is a 1 year journey. 1 week of 52 weeks not going to kill a bird. I need to remain focus and make sure that I do what I need to do to make sure that I get back on track. This is going to be difficult month. I guess for this month is about maintaining before moving to a big push in the final month.
To be honest – I have already forgotten the things or principles that I have thought on day 27 from a youtube video:
While we are at this, I watched a youtube video on the 5 things that will be the key to weight loss. Following:
- Cook in Bulk
- Accept Failure and Move On Yes.
- Remove All Temptations
- Tell Everyone Yes.
I guess I struggle with 1 and 2 which is to me very important. I will get back to normal for 1, and for 2 – I will cook some thing in bulk today. I may taste shit but I need to do it. At least to cover for today and tomorrow. Most importantly given the situation that I am now, 3 is where I am now. I need to accept the failure that I have done for the last week and move with life. I know I am scared to stand on the weighing scale but I guess I need to do it at some point of time.
The another point that I wanted to bring up is that I sprained my ankle on Friday in which I could not walk on Friday(66) and Saturday(67). This was really bad. I keep telling myself that I won’t be jumping into the black hole but the way that I have been treating myself for the last couple of days – I am in the black hole. I acknowledged that I have cheated myself. I have cheated on what I have done to build the consistency for the past two months. It is a shame that I do that, but as per principle number 3- Accept Failure and Move On. This is how we going to do it, this is how I am going to push myself. Today is a brand new day. I know that I can’t go to the gym as my leg won’t be able to handle any load bearing, therefore I will either do swimming or rowing today. In fact this morning, I will do an hour of rowing. Must, must.
It has been a crazy week indeed. Time to move on. Reflecting on the shit that I have done, I need to start pushing hard. This week is relaxing week – just pure cardio for 1 week. I am giving myself a 2 weeks break for now because I need to get my ankle to recover completely before I start running again. The pain has subsided but as the ligament will need to rebuild itself, I need to reduce any load bearing exercises to make sure that I am good to go. Slowly but sure I will do this. I can’t let myself down for just a week. I know I have gone thru this journey way too many times, and all these instances are the ones that dragged me down the black hole. I will jump out. I know I have done a mistake by jumping down and letting me go down deeper and deeper. Things will change today.
It is amazing to see how a journal like this can change the way that I think, the way that I feel, and how it makes me feel so motivated for the day. Rather than feeling super horrible (which is what I felt in the past couple of days), I actually feel super motivated to get myself up and move out of the ditch. I know it is horrible to think of what I have done, but it is also amazing to see the impact of such journals have on the way that I feel. In fact, I am thinking of doing this journal more often, maybe 2 or 3 times a day just to get my brain fart out of the way and make me feel motivated throughout the day. I need to do this, I need to keep myself motivated always. If I don’t do this, I will jump into the black hole again. Must keep motivated to be honest. This is going to be tough. But who said it was easy, if it was easy I guess everybody will be healthy. Time to move on today, time to push hard. I can do this shit!